Are Taiwan Girls a Bad Trade?
台灣女生是不划算的投資嗎?作者：Rocco DiSpirito / rocco.dispirito@go4more.de
As a foreigner was asked to write about a Taiwanese topic which is not easy when you are only 6 months in Taiwan. It is even more difficult to find a topic which is not criticizing everything. However during my stay in Taiwan I was lucky become friends with some Taiwanese girls and many of them asked me the same question.
身為一個來台灣只有六個月的外國人，被要求寫篇跟台灣有關的文章真不是件簡單的事，尤其是要寫一篇不是一直批評東批評西的文章。無論如何，我在台灣的期間還是很幸運的和一些台灣女生成為朋友，而她們很常問我這個問題:
What am I doing wrong? I met a foreign guy. I think we loved each other but now he left me. They either went back home or found a new girl. Didn’t I put enough effort into the relationship? Am I not looking good enough?
我做錯了什麼?我認識了一個外國人，我以為我們彼此相愛，可是他離開了我，他們不是回故鄉就是認識了另一個女孩。難道我付出的不夠多嗎?還是我不夠漂亮?
I must admit. I don’t know anything about Taiwanese girls and very little about the kind of foreign guys in Taiwan. As I consider myself to come from the civilized part of the western world and Australian farm boys, Canadian English teachers and Central American scholarship billionaires are as exotic for me as they are for Taiwanese. But I do not overrate them and that is a point that brings us closer to the dilemma. In the best case this foreign guys are not able to plan ahead for a long time because they are students. In the worst case they just don’t have a future at home. The drama starts when a Taiwanese girl falls in love with a foreigner or even things about marriage.
我必須承認我不了解台灣女生也對在台灣的外國人不太認識。我自認來自於西方文明國家，而我對澳洲農莊男孩、加拿大的英文老師、和從中美洲來這領獎學金的億萬富豪們1也和一般台灣人一樣覺得很新奇，不過我並不會因為特別崇拜他們，而這就是我們要談的重點。在比較好的情況下，這些外國人無法為未來打算，因為他們還是學生，最壞的狀況是，他們在自己的家鄉根本沒有未來。當一個台灣女生愛上一個外國人或甚至想到要結婚，好戲就上場了!
I discovered a international truth in the relation between Taiwanese girls and foreign boys and I would like to share this with you. First I beg your pardon ladies. This is going to be a straight forward business analysis rather than Sex and the City blabla.
我發現了一個台灣女生和外國男生談戀愛的國際定律，我想在此分享。首先我要跟所有女士們聲明，這是一個很直接的商業分析而不是慾望城市中的閒話家常。
In my opinion most Taiwanese girls do the mistake to think about their foreign boyfriends as an investment. Maybe the boy is rich in her point of view. He can take her out to American Bagle and Steak House on his scooter or maybe you can learn English with him.
在我看來，大部份的台灣女生犯的最大的錯誤就是把外國男友當做一種投資，也許在她們眼中，那個男孩算蠻有錢，他可以騎車載她去NY Bagel 和牛排館，又或者她可以從他身上學到英文。
As a banker I would like to give Taiwanese girls the following advice for their predicament. These guys don’t invest into you and you shouldn’t invest either. In banking we would call this guys a trading position, not a buy and hold.
身為一個銀行家，我想給身在這樣困境中的台灣女生以下建議:這些男生不會在你身上投資，而妳也不應該投資在他身上。在銀行界，我們稱這些男生為 “可被交易的” (trading position) 而不是“可持有的”(buy and hold)。
Here’s why. The longer you hold these guys, the smaller the payoff gets. As soon as the visa expires you lose all of your investment. This does not mean you shouldn’t date foreign guys. I am sure there are a lot of charming single foreigners out there. But it is nothing more than a simple deal. You bring in your looks. You help him to get along in daily life. He brings in the money or some language teaching ability.
原因是，你把這些男生留的越久，他的報酬率就越小，當他的簽證一過期你的投資也就失敗了。這不表示你不應該和外國人約會，我相信還是有一些很迷人的單身外國人，但是一切就僅止於:你帶著你漂亮的外表，順便幫助他在異鄉的生活，而他帶著一些錢和一身教英文的技能。
But here’s the hook, you will graduate and they will teach English at a cram school. In fact, it is very likely that you income increases but it is an absolute certainty that they won’t get done much except teaching English!
有意思的發展是，你會從學校畢業而他們會待在補習班教英文。事實是，你的收入很有可能會增加，而更可確定的是，他們除了教英文什麼事也做不了!
So, in economic terms they are a depreciating asset and you are an earning asset. Not only is he an depreciating asset, his depreciation accelerates! The longer he stays in Taiwan without a decent job, the more difficult it gets for him to get back into serious work and earn serious money. In banking terms, we would call him a trading position, not a buy and hold…hence the hook…long term relationship or even marriage. It doesn’t make good business sense to “invest into a foreign boy friend” so you should rather lease. If his scholarship, teaching job or visa was going away so would he. It’s as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not marriage.
因此，以經濟學的角度來看，他們是 “貶值資產” (depreciating asset)而你是 “增值資產” (earning asset)， 他不只是貶值資產，貶值的速率還非常之快。他在台灣隨便做個工作的時間越久越難回到正式的職場開始工作賺錢，在銀行學裡，我們稱他們為 “可被交易的” (trading position) 而不是“可持有的”(buy and hold)。換言之，以長期的情侶關係或甚至婚姻來說“外國男友並不是很好的商業投資”，你應該“只租不買”。如果他的獎學金、教書工作、或簽證有一天會 失效，那他也會。一切都很簡單，比較可行的方法是只要約會不要結婚
I hope this is helpful, and if there are girls out there who want to enter into some sort of lease, please let me know.
我希望以上建議有幫上忙，如果有任何人也想 “只租不買”，請跟我連絡。
- 作者原文中意思為，相較於大部份台灣大學生過著比較簡樸的生活，一個月領上萬元獎學金的外籍生簡直可被稱為億萬富豪。[back]
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